Where to begin?! This is my first ever blog. I wonder how many blogs start with those exact same words? I have read many, commented on a few but, until today, never considered writing my own. I am still not entirely sure anyone would want to read it, which is probably just as well given I have no idea if hitting the big orange 'publish' button actually enables anyone to stumble across what I write. Plus I don't think this is something I am ready to share with people I know in the real world, so I don't plan to advertise it in my social networking circles...
So what happened today to inspire me to embark upon blogging? Such a funny word, 'blogging'. As the title suggests, I have been a passenger on an infertility roller-coaster for just over three years. 37 months to be exact. Or 44 months if we date it back to the day my husband and I started actively trying for a baby without knowing the challenges that lay ahead. That's just under 4 years, approximately 8% of my life, or more significantly, around 88% of my married life. That may just be the most maths I have done since A'level (which I passed by the way...I feel the need to promote myself as an intelligent human being at the beginning of this blog in the hope that whatever comes out of my future typing can be seen in the context of a bright, capable person, affected by some challenging life experiences which have the potential to impact upon said person's ability to present coherent, intelligible...where was I going with this?). Oh yes, for 4 of my 4.5 years of marriage my husband and I have been strapped in tight to the infertility roller-coaster, racing through peaks and troughs, and long, long periods on the slow inclines in between treatment.
In that time, I have drawn strength and support from close friends and family members. I have also discovered the power of friendship through posting messages on a fertility support website. It was on there that I made an incredible friend in another young lady, bravely facing her own off-road journey to a baby, while regularly sending me cyber love and support. Today she sent me a link to a blog written by a new mum, who is also a survivor of fertility treatment (http://the2weekwait.blogspot.co.uk - I thoroughly recommend a read). With the encouragement of the friend who sent me the link to the blog, I decided to sit down, start typing and see what happened. It helps that I am 'working' from home today, which translates to: an impeccably clean and tidy flat, 2 loads of washing done and blueberry muffins baked, while my pile of work has been shifted from sofa to coffee table and back to sofa. I will make a start as soon as I have given this blog thing a try...
I am unsure of blog etiquette - how much is ok to write on your first post? Should I end with a cliffhanger to encourage my readers to come back for more? I can't promise to always be cheery or to have funny stories to share. But what I hope to do is give an insight into my journey as I embark on what will be our 8th attempt at making a baby the scientific way (there have been many more attempts the traditional way). I have never achieved a pregnancy, nor have I been able to have a fresh embryo transferred due to my special way of responding to the fertility drugs. I have had two cycles of ICSI (similar to IVF), in which I collectively produced 61 eggs (I am reeeeeally good at making eggs), which made a total of 27 embryos, all of which had to be frozen (if they had transferred any at the time and I had become pregnant, I would have been at high risk of developing OHSS, which is potentially life threatening). Over a two and a half year period we have had the best 14 of those embryos transferred two at a time, but none have stuck.
So within the next couple of weeks I will be starting on the drugs again and hoping and praying that I respond like a normal person and we are able to make at least 2 good embryos, which can be transferred without going in and out of the freezer. I hope to share my experiences as I go along and I can also think of a few little anecdotes from the past, which will hopefully make you smile. They did us, eventually, which I think may be the secret of our survival thus far...
And so to end this beginning with a request for advice: for any ladies who have been through fertility treatment, or even just a smear test, is it more appropriate to have a bikini wax so all is tidy down there, or to leave things au natural, so not to appear to be trying to impress? I have so far just tried to pretend that the nurses and docs see so many lady bits that they don't care what they look like, but am having a crisis of confidence and am concerned I may be the only woman at the clinic to have not taken care of things appropriately?!
Thank you for reading and I hope you will continue to share my journey. Fasten those seat belts...
To answer your last question first, only wax if you usually do. Especially if you don't do it very often, you are more likely to get a rash, and for sure it will be more sensitive, so it can actually make the process more difficult.
ReplyDeleteIt is always up to you how long a post is. What do you want to share? How many words does it take *you* to say what you mean and want to share? Your answer to those questions should be your only guide in deciding what or how long to make a post.
I had a five year journey to have my oldest son. We didn't have the money to try IVF, so we just had to hope and pray through a PCOS diagnosis and several first trimester miscarriages.
We expected my oldest might be our only child since our insurance didn't cover infertility treatments. After I stopped nursing, I found myself pregnant with twins with an 18 month old. I again dealt with fertility issues when my three year old was conceived.
Okay, I have rambled enough. If you want to check out my blog that features a lot of poetry, as well as personal essays and regular contests, you can find it at findingmywaysoftly.blogspot.com
Welcome to blogging! Julia
One other word of advice as you are getting started, you have a limit on comment lengths. I had written about four times as much as was in the comment originally. Since I am on my iPhone, I could copy and paste it into several separate posts, so I just cut out most of it.
ReplyDeleteIf you only want short comments, there isn't anything wrong with that, but you may find that the comments aren't as in depth as they might be.
Hi Julia, Thank you so much for taking the time to read my blog and to leave a comment. I am sorry for any hassle you had posting - I will attempt to change the settings to enable longer replies. It's amazing to hear what other people think, especially wonderful ladies like yourself who have been on their own version of the IF roller-coaster. I look forward to reading more about your experiences in your blog. Thank you again!! x
ReplyDelete